Over coffee, on a sunny day, I met up with an old, dear friend. As we discussed various topics, one pressing question emerged: How to feel in more control of your life? It made me think about the importance of fostering agency, and what that means on a daily basis.

Imagine the following: Imagine walking along a twisting path through a dense forest. The path is twisted, and you have to choose the way. This is life. It’s a path filled with choices, triumphs, and challenges. How can some navigate life with ease and others find it difficult?

Let’s first and foremost talk about self awareness. It’s as if you planted your feet firmly in the ground. It’s like walking blindfolded without knowing what you want and who you are. Self-awareness can be the compass to navigate through this dense forest. You must be aware of your strengths, weaknesses and values. As Socrates said, “Know yourself.”

Next, let’s discuss decision-making. Oh, choosing is so difficult! You’ve probably stood in an ice cream shop, faced with 31 different flavors and felt paralyzed. It can be difficult to make decisions in life. Start small. Daily, mundane choices. Every brick in your life is built by each decision.

Tom was a good friend who never left his house without a notebook. Every night he would write his goals for the following day. This routine was his life. This routine gave him a feeling of control and direction. Little did he realize, he was cultivating his agency.

Now, you’re not an island. Many of our experiences are shaped through interactions with other people. Communication is the key. Imagine steering a vessel. Communication with your crew should be clear and concise. Speak out if something is bothering you. Express your appreciation. Use your voice. You’re under-using this tool.

Resilience is another important factor. Oh, what a backbone! Life knocks you down. Life happens. Remember when you scraped your leg after falling off your bike? You got up, and you tried again. Adults may carry scars on their hearts and minds. The game is still the same. Get up. Dust yourself off. Keep moving forward. Stay the course.

Ever heard the phrase “embracing uncertainty”? It’s like dancing in the pouring rain rather than waiting for the storm. Stephen from my workplace hopped around from one job or another, not knowing where he was going to land. He viewed every step as an opportunity for learning, not a fatal flaw. Every curveball that life throws is an opportunity for learning.

Boundaries must be respected. It’s like building a fence to surround your garden. What goes in, and what does not go in is up to you. Boundaries are important for your mental health, no matter if they’re personal or work-related. When necessary, you should say no. Prioritize tasks. It’s as simple as standing your ground and planting your flag.

Perspective is another weapon. Have you ever zoomed into Google Maps in order to get a bigger picture? Perspective is important when you’re trying to find agency. View your life in a bird’s eye perspective. Celebrate small victories, and learn lessons from setbacks. Balance is important. Jack becomes dull when he does nothing but work.

Putting aside strategies, cultivating a growth-mindset can change the game. Imagine that life is a videogame. Each level offers new challenges and abilities to master. Embrace the challenges. Commit to continual learning and improvement. The brain can grow. Flex it!

A thought for you: What if we embraced our imperfections? Lisa, a friend who was a perfectionist, found peace with messy art. It’s okay if not everything is picture-perfect. Even the chaos of everyday life can be beautiful. It’s liberating.

In a nutshell, you can think of it as baking a delicious cake. Get your ingredients together: self-awareness; decision-making; communication; resilience. Mix the ingredients well. Be patient when baking. It’s possible that you will have a few flops. Soon enough, though, you will taste the sweet taste that comes with empowerment.